I Take It Personally

“I don’t know your life, but you’ve thrown it all on Jesus. You’ve gambled everything on Jesus. You’ve put all your eggs in one basket and that’s namely the leadership of Jesus. And I feel like God is saying, ‘I will not disappoint you. That you will not experience shame.’ And I sense the Lord is saying, ‘what you have done is precious to me.’ That you’re like the spies, Joshua and Caleb, that when they believed, Jesus says, ‘Oh, I take it personally.’ Cuz the ones who didn’t believe, God said, “they haven’t rejected you, they rejected me.” That’s such an interesting comment. He took it so personal. And, I feel like the Lord has taken it so personal how you’ve believed.”

On Saturday night, I went to spend some time in prayer at Pasadena House of Prayer (PIHOP) and forgot that it was their night of prophetic prayer called, The Well. People sign up for personal prayer appointments where volunteers and PIHOP staff pray for you one-on-one asking the Lord what he saying to you/about you. I signed up for a walk-in appointment and walked away incredibly encouraged. A man and a woman, whom I’ve never met, prayed for me for about 10 minutes. They knew nothing about my life or current situation, other than my name. My opening paragraph is a small snapshot of what they prayed over me.

What these people did NOT know is that I’m walking through a pretty intense season of trusting the Lord for His leading and guidance for my next steps, which also includes trusting him for my day-to-day provisions on a level that is, truthfully, quite uncomfortable for most, and if I’m most honest, for myself. I truly have put all of my eggs in one basket, and that basket reads in HUGE letters – JESUS.

I’ve been walking through this “season” for several years as I’ve ventured off the so-called “beaten path” of certainty and have dove into the possibilities of what it looks like to follow the dreams God has placed in my heart, even if the plans are not ironed out completely.  Plain and simple – Jesus isn’t just my backup plan – He is THE plan.

I’ve known Jesus long enough and studied his words enough to know that He is walking with me and will provide every the step along the way, even if it means I’m living off of the literal daily bread “The Lord’s Prayer” talks about. I know the supernatural provision of “daily bread” and feel incredibly “seen” and “known” by the Lord in those moments where He shows up with miraculous provision…yet, again. Every time he provides, it’s so personal – whether it’s a friend on the phone that asks, “Do you need money? Yes? Great. I’m sending a check.” or getting hired to watch a friend’s child, or do errands for someone, just at that time when I need the provision.

So, in response to the prayers prayed over me on Saturday regarding how Jesus takes it personally how I chose to follow Him, I, too, take it personally how He kindly provides and chooses to care for me. It’s a really crazy give-and-take/ win-win relationship. Though I do GREATLY desire stability and financial freedom, etc., those desires do not dictate my decisions as much as my desire to experience the joy of walking so closely with my Heavenly Father, enjoying His provision and protection on a very personal and tangible level.  I take it very personally.

How are you currently experiencing putting your trust in the Lord?

Are all your eggs in one basket (Jesus), or is your trust misplaced (in politics, relationships, the economy, etc)

What is one area in your life you can step out this week and trust God that He will provide?

Here are some promises I know to be very true in my life, as I trust Jesus and His leadership/provision:

Matthew 6:25-34
 No one can serve two masters. If you try, you will wind up loving the first master and hating the second, or vice versa. People try to serve both God and money—but you can’t. You must choose one or the other.  Here is the bottom line: do not worry about your life. Don’t worry about what you will eat or what you will drink. Don’t worry about how you clothe your body. Living is about more than merely eating, and the body is about more than dressing up. Look at the birds in the sky. They do not store food for winter. They don’t plant gardens. They do not sow or reap—and yet, they are always fed because your heavenly Father feeds them. And you are even more precious to Him than a beautiful bird. If He looks after them, of course He will look after you.  Worrying does not do any good; who here can claim to add even an hour to his life by worrying?  Nor should you worry about clothes. Consider the lilies of the field and how they grow. They do not work or weave or sew, and yet their garments are stunning.  Even King Solomon, dressed in his most regal garb, was not as lovely as these lilies.  And think about grassy fields—the grasses are here now, but they will be dead by winter. And yet God adorns them so radiantly. How much more will He clothe you, you of little faith, you who have no trust?  So do not consume yourselves with questions: What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?  Outsiders make themselves frantic over such questions; they don’t realize that your heavenly Father knows exactly what you need. Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and then all these things will be given to you too.  So do not worry about tomorrow. Let tomorrow worry about itself. Living faithfully is a large enough task for today.

Joshua 1:9
This is My command: be strong and courageous. Never be afraid or discouraged because I am your God, the Eternal One, and I will remain with you wherever you go.

Ephesians 3:20
Now to the God who can do so many awe-inspiring things, immeasurable things, things greater than we ever could ask or imagine through the power at work in us...

Psalms 84:11
For the Eternal God is a sun and a shield.  The Eternal grants favor and glory; He doesn’t deny any good thing to those who live with integrity.

Philippians 4:6-7
Don’t be anxious about things; instead, pray. Pray about everything. He longs to hear your requests, so talk to God about your needs and be thankful for what has come. 7 And know that the peace of God (a peace that is beyond any and all of our human understanding) will stand watch over your hearts and minds in Jesus, the Anointed One.

Philippians 4:19
Know this: my God will also fill every need you have according to His glorious riches in Jesus the Anointed, our Liberating King.


Written by Molly, Los Angeles, California

The Upside Down

I was hanging upside down the other day and screaming and holding on for dear life when it came to me……I chose this.

I was riding a rather intense roller coaster with my kids at Six Flags Magic Mountain.  It is called Twisted Colossus.  You should click on the link below so you can see what I am talking about.  Every time I ride it I am reminded of the journey our family is on with Jesus.  Every time I am literally hanging upside down for what seems like forever, I think….I have to write about this!(Odd thoughts to have during a roller coaster ride) But, it is true that this is what our journey is like and, it is true that…I chose this. 

When I was in the second half of my 30’s….I rode a particularly rough roller coaster.  I came away from it with a headache and I was disoriented like never before. I pulled some neck and back muscles as well.   I told Chuck, 

 “Maybe 30-something is the end of roller-coaster riding for me.”  

But somehow, now, at the age of 47, I find myself regularly hanging in some twisted, abnormal position while traveling at 80 miles per hour in some type of open car.  There are multiple occasions where there is only this lap bar between me and certain death.  This bar holds me in this car…while we dangle upside down.  I am spending 85% of the time not even touching the seat on this one.  Especially on the 85 degree drop that starts it all off after a slow climb up the chain hill.

“If it is so scary, why do you choose to ride it? “  You may be thinking.

I ask myself this question mid-ride almost every time. In fact, I usually scream out, “Why am I on this?”   The answer wins out over fear and my age every time.  Because Micah and Benjamin jumped up and down and begged me to ride.  Because our whole family can ride it together and we share in one of the most terrifying and exciting experiences we have had together.  Because the danger of what is happening somehow amplifies the fun we are having.  There is something so glorious about screaming and yelling and hearing your children yell, 

“THIS… IS…AWESOME !!!!” that outweighs the fear.  And, if I sit on a bench while they ride, I never get to hear and experience this with them first hand.  I will only get to hear the stories of their glorious conquests, but I will not be a partner with them in it.  And that is not really living life.  It is not how I was created to live!  So, I choose to ride. 

I remember the first time we all rode it.  We finally jerked to a stop and we looked around at each other with hair that had been abused by the wind while our eyes were wide with the insanity of what we had just experienced. We were quiet for only a second when Chuck said to me,

“What just happened?”  

Then, we laughed and yelled and tried to talk about all our fears and favorite moments all at once, with voices that were hoarse from screaming and yelling.  

When I looked back over the ride, it kind of seemed like a 4 min. reenactment of our whole lives that I didn’t realize until God called us out of Berlin and into Los Angeles.  I’ve often felt like we have repeatedly agreed to get on a ride we were “too old for” now.  It certainly hasn’t been what I thought it would be. Our lives have been flipped upside down again and again with unexpected drops that were steeper than seem humanly possible. And, we have legitimately only been held in a place of safety by God himself.  He alone stands between us and certain death.  But when we stop….and acknowledge the shock and move past it….we can’t stop talking about how much fun we had, or how terrified we have been on this ride that God has jumped up and down and begged us to get on with Him.  

And then, we completely lose our “common sense” and consider riding again.  

The good news is that, at any point during a Twisted Colossus ride, I can look over at Micah and Benjamin and learn.  I often tell them they are crazy roller coaster riders because I see them….arms extended above their heads, their little bodies not touching the seats at all and they are screaming with delight….not fear.  They have relinquished all control, are totally in the moment of enjoying the ride, and their bodies sway and flow with the motions of the coaster.  It is the time of their lives.  They laugh and yell and even power through their own fears.  Benjamin has even said before the ride,

 “I’m afraid, but I’m going to do it anyway.  I know I will love it.”  

And I hear my own voice talking to Jesus in his same shaky, scared tone.  

So, what I have learned from their reckless abandonment of (seemingly) all sense, is that you don’t end up with a headache or strained muscles if you release control.  You enjoy the ride fully if you are not trying to protect yourself from injury and death.  You let the safety bars do their job because you cannot protect yourself anyway.  You enjoy the ride.  It might not be what you expected, but that is what makes it worth riding.  Releasing the control you never had to begin with is the key to being able to ride roller coasters at any age.  There is no time limit that says “you are now too old to ride” unless you simply choose it to be so.  So, I have learned (while hanging upside down) that this is just like our spiritual journey through life with Jesus.  At any age, He asks us (or asks us again!) to go on a crazy journey with Him.  And, the moment I stop trusting Him and try to “protect” myself, I strain something unnecessarily.  

And why would we choose this?  Why would we choose a journey where we can’t plan our future and we have no security and we can't protect our children?  Who would do that? Who would knowingly strap themselves into such a ride?  Weren’t we raised better than that?  Aren’t we adults?  Don’t we have a responsibility to our children?  What about the fact you are getting older?

We choose to ride because we know Jesus and we know that His protection and provision are the only ones that actually exist.  

And, He begs us to join Him because He knows that we are going to have a terrifyingly fun experience that will bind us together with Him and with each other that will give a solidness that the world cannot offer. Knowing Him so intimately is the greatest responsibility we have to our children.  When we are hanging upside down and twisting and turning through a maze of new experiences we realize….there’s no place we’d rather be.  

We find peace where we should find fear.  

We find security where we should find terror.  

We trust deeply and learn to be loved thoroughly. 

 And instead of hearing of the stories of faith, we experience them.  

We become the living documentary of the presence of God.  

Our passion shines gloriously obvious in the wildness of our eyes. 

And in laughter and tears and with voices hoarse from excitement, we jump up and down and beg others to lose their common sense and ride.  

Trust us…you’ll LOVE it.  

Take a Ride on Twisted Colossus!

Written by Della, Los Angeles, California

Follow her journey here.